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Concerning Eggs and Elf Ears
Tuesday, Feb. 04, 2003

Good grief, y'all are not going to believe what happened to me at work yesterday...

It was about 6:30 p.m., thirty minutes before the Pharmacy closes, and Scott, one of our LOD's (Leader on Duty) called. He told Tasha that he needed me up at the front lanes. We didn't know why because we were about to close, and we're always busy around that time, but he made it seem like an emergency.

When I was on my way up front, I figured they were short on cashiers and needed me to help out for a few minutes. But when I got there, I realized that there were no lines. I saw Scott standing by Lane 8, and he was giving me a funny look. I walked up to him and asked him what was wrong. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news here..." he started (at this point I began to panic because I thought someone had died or something), "but your truck has been egged." My first thought was "What a relief!" (After all, I was thinking that someone had died.) My second thought was "Who in the world would want to egg my car?"

Scott went on to tell me that Alan's truck was egged as well, and a bit of egg got onto a guest's car. I went outside and I met Justin in the parking lot. We went over to have a look at my poor trucky, and it was a pretty icky sight. Egg yolk was all over the hood, shells everywhere... Alan's truck was the same way. Scott came up behind me and said that the police were on their way and that I'd need to give a statement and whatnot, so we all kind of waited by the Garden Center.

I talked to Ryan (who works in Garden) and Alan about the whole thing, and they had actually seen and talked to the egger. She had apparently gone into the store and left without even buying anything. But about a minute after she left (she went out through the Garden Center) she came back in. This time, she had something to purchase: five dozen eggs.

Ryan thought this was a tad suspicious, so he watched her go out to her car. She got in, rolled down her windows, and started to throw eggs at our vehicles! Ryan called Alan over the walkies and told him what was going on. He ran outside and saw the crazy lady throwing the eggs, and walked up to her car and asked her what the hell she was doing. He said that she tried to hide the eggs, and then said that she wasn't doing anything. He told me that she was extremely gross (fat, really short hair, manly, not wearing a bra... you get the idea...) and seemed very �out of it.� We still had no idea why she would do a thing like that, though.

A few minutes later a cop arrived and we told him what had happened. Luckily, Alan had gotten her license plate number and the officer (who was very nice and helpful) was able to look her up. Turns out she lives in one of the apartment complexes down the street from Target, so he made a little trip over to her house.

When he got back to Target, the officer told us that when she opened her door, the woman had egg all over her clothes! Haha. At first she denied everything (�I didn�t throw any eggs, officer��) but eventually he got it out of her. Apparently, when she came out to her car for the first time, she had a flat tire and assumed that a Target employee had slashed her tire (why would any of us do something like that?). So, to get even, she decided to go buy some eggs and throw them at our cars, although we�re still baffled as to how she knew that she was throwing the eggs at the cars of employees� weird, eh? Unfortunately nothing could be done because there was no damage (yargh!) but she�s pretty much banned from our store for the rest of her life. And believe me, if she ever has the nerve to come back, we�ll be waiting� see how she likes it when HER car gets egged�

Anywho, after all that was over (and I�m still on the clock by the way� heh) Alan and I washed our cars. He is so incredibly sweet! It was really nice of him to help me get my baby clean. After mine was all done, I helped him wash his. Even though it stinks that this whole thing happened, we ended up having a pretty fun time (at least I thought so). I suppose there�s a reason for everything�

When I got home, I got online and one of the Sisters sent me an invite to a chat. Yay! Everyone kept sending links to all these extremely gorgeous pictures of the hobbit actors� I sent one of the pictures of Elijah Wood to Justin, because I thought it was absolutely hilarious� and rather interesting� here is how our convo went�

SevenNchik: yeow!
SevenNchik: crotch shot
SevenNchik: lol its hilarious
enkubiss: do I wanna click?
SevenNchik: yes
enkubiss: lol... is he sporting wood?
SevenNchik: Elijah.... Wood?
enkubiss: lol!!!!
SevenNchik: haha
SevenNchik: we made a funny!
enkubiss: I totally forgot about that... I was too slow
SevenNchik: omg thats so great
enkubiss: lol... that's clever
SevenNchik: yes yes
SevenNchik: we're the clever ones... yes, precious... heh
SevenNchik: I love it!
enkubiss: Elijah "Wood"... He likes the wood...
enkubiss: say it really fast
enkubiss: lol
SevenNchik: !!!!!!
SevenNchik: hahaha

Oh, that Justin. He cracks me up. Hehehe. Later on in the evening, I had a funny �lil chit chat with Jason, concerning Cookie and pointy ears�

SevenNchik: hobbits
AlMightyPePe22: u r evil, u shouldn't be looking at that, u have Chris for all of ur needs
SevenNchik: but I have to have my hobbit/elf fantasies...
SevenNchik: I mean uh....
SevenNchik: nvm
AlMightyPePe22: lol
AlMightyPePe22: dress him up, then have ur way with him
AlMightyPePe22: lol
SevenNchik: hmmm... I wonder where I can find some pointy ears to put on him...
SevenNchik: I wonder...
AlMightyPePe22: lol
AlMightyPePe22: he is gonna kick my ass for giving u that idea
SevenNchik: lol
AlMightyPePe22: oh well, make sure u take pics of it, so it's worth it
AlMightyPePe22: if I�m gonna get beat up, I want a pic out of it
SevenNchik: ok sure thing
AlMightyPePe22: woohoo
SevenNchik: eeeeehehehehe

Thanks for the idea, Jason. Heh heh heh. I�ll be sure to remember my camera.



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